Give me all my garmonbozia.

I'm just getting so lazy! I made a list in a drafted post of all the things I've been doing that I wanted to write about. I'll try to do something with it now. Who knows how far I'll get before my faulpelz tendencies win?

beer garden- The lovely and amazing Miss Meghan Dalton came to town a few weeks ago with her new beau, Derek. I got to see her a few different times, and we managed to scrape together a last-minute trip to the beer garden. We all thought we'd call it an early night....but seven or nineteen pitchers later, I found myself drunk, snapping pictures of Athena on 30th Avenue, heading to Erin and Jimmy's to watch Mad Men. My love for Don Draper grows proportionally to my consumption of alcohol. I think that's only natural.

beach- Craig, Nitz and I decided we'd take advantage of the waning days of summer and go to the beach. We got in many fights about where we'd go; one ending in me yelling "I just don't want to talk to you anymore!" and hanging up on Craig. The fight stemmed from my refusal to take the LIRR when I can, theoretically, get to several beaches via the MTA, and via my already-paid-for monthly pass. I am very, very cheap. I don't know why he hasn't learned this yet. Anyway, I eventually got my way (what a brat) and we went to Riis Beach. It seemed lovely and all was well...until we tried swimming and emerged from the surf covered in........PIECES OF JELLYFISH. One of my comrades informs me that jellyfish can be eaten. I'd like someone to eat ALL of them so I never have to deal with them on a beach again. Despite this, the day was good.

work- I'm back at it. I'm complaining. But at least I'm slightly less broke. Slightly.

play in park- Nitz and Molly and I saw Common Thread do Under Milk Wood in the Prospect Park concert grove. I guess my point in recording this is to remind myself that I actually do stuff?

yelp parties galore- Two silly Yelp parties; one at The Gutter, where I wolfed a piece of pizza and didn't speak a word to anyone, and one at Barramundi where Erin and I chugged sangria and ate the hell out of some empanadas, empanadas. What would I do without Yelp and, as Emily says, the 'free booze parties?'

erin's birthday, karaoke- happened a long time ago, wow. Wait, I already wrote about that, and my spiritual awakening at the karaoke place. Bo-ring!

blue velvet in pool- They rescheduled Blue Velvet at McCarren and I went alone and it was great. There was a grizzled old biker cowboy next to me who looked like he probably used some of Dennis Hopper's moves in his halcyon days. He incessantly rolled cigarettes, chuckled knowingly, and drank from a paper bag.

no money- I guess I felt it necessary to remind myself of the fact that I have no money?

hipster bbq- Oh! I went to the end-of-summer hipster bbq at Hope Lounge bc my friend MAtt was working and there was the promise of freee food. That promise was happily fulfilled and I had a nice time eating delicious things, watching hipsters, wondering if it was my lack of tattoos or my clean hair that deterred people from talking to me. Or the neon sign flashing "SQUARE."

auditon for bob- I went to a big audition at the New York Film Academy and I knew the reader. I went to school with him. I didn't get anything from this audition. COINCIDENCE?! No, probably not.

crown heights- My friends moved there! To a nice place on Franklin Avenue. It's nice to know that Crown Heights isn't ALL fires in the mirror. Right? RIGHT? As I walked their the other day, a guy jovially inquired what I was doing with all that junk in my trunk. Good question, sir!

playa- Along the same lines, I got some good lines from a dude on the train the other day. He asked me if I got my smile from heaven or if I'd bought it at the store (duh, at Hot Topic, I replied....I WISH); he said he hoped there was someone special in my life and that they treated me like a queen; and best of all, he asked me if I was on that train often. Good!

penguin- AND, today, a creepy dude told me "The bus is waiting for you. The bus is waiting for you. And then he opened his umbrella in my face a la The Penguin.

jekyll and hyde- I went to Jekyll and Hyde the other night. I will let that speak for itself. No-- I can't let it rest at that. It. Was. Terrific.

LES- Sang in the LES on Saturday. Tons of new singers-- tons of YOUNG new singers. Things are looking up! But I can still hate that two of my best singing friends are moving away. And I do.

Ok done! See you in three months!

SKINNY PEOPLE EAT CANDY

I just saw the rescheduled Summer Screen showing of Blue Velvet at McCarren and it was a delightful time...if delightful means disturbing, demented, deranged...etc.

My favorite part was probably the crowd's response when Dennis Hopper yells "Heineken?! Fuck that shit! PABST BLUE RIBBON!" And the hipsters roared. (They're on the same page.)

It wasn't as scary seeing it the second time, especially because it was ten o'clock when I got out and I only had to walk across the park to get home; the first time, it was two am, Meghan and I were scared witless, and I had to walk from Coolidge Corner to Kenmore Square (thanks MBTA) in the rain. Or maybe I'm imagining the rain.

Another Lynchian incident today was me spending ten of my few remaining dollars to buy 3/4ths of the first season of Twin Peaks from the video store that's going out of busines. It's on DVD...but the first disc is missing. I bought Sweeney Todd the other day and went in today and just couldn't resist. I have no business spending money on this stuff. But I do.

Logs logs logs!

On the phone, at work:

Me: Good afternoon...
Guy: Hi! Who's this?
Me: It's Anna.
Guy: Hi, Anna! This is Jon from Blankety Blank company-- I have to swing by to pick up some dorm keys later. What time are you going to be open until today?
Me: Well, I'll be in the box office until five...there should be a few people in the office after that, though, if you can't make it.
Guy: Hmm, ok...well...I think I can make you. You'll be there until five, you say? And then you're going to Williamsburg right after?
Me: Yes, I am.
Guy: Really?!
Me: Uh, yeah. How did you know? Could you hear the hipster in my voice? You knew I was wearing, like, big glasses?
Guy: Yeah! I knew you were wearing ridiculous tights...or something from American Apparel.

What?

No, what?

And why didn't it occur to me to say: Why did you ask?

TEMPT NOT

So, Erin had her birthday party last night at Planet Rose on Avenue A (can I say 'Alphabet City'? Ooh, it just makes me fee so OVER THE MOON)...a karaoke place with a strange mixture of passive-aggressive screechy girls, Really Serious Karaoke Dudes, bros with baseball caps, and our gang.

Anyway, I've never done karaoke before, and put a lot of thought into what I would sing when the moment finally came. I decided on '(What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace, Love and Understanding?' by Elvis Costello and The Attractions partially as a homage to Bill Murray's karaoke in Lost in Translation, and partially because I of course love Elvis. Now, as it happens, I wound up only singing a duet with the birthday gal on 'Paradise By the Dashboard Light' which was more that fine, considering that it was the realization of long-time dreams for both of us. Good.

Now, the point of this post is not to talk Meatloaf-- the point is that my eyes were opened to the amazing possibilities of karaoke in my life last night.

They. Had. Showtunes.

They had 'The Ladies Who Lunch.'

I was like "I could ruin EVERYONE'S night right now and have the time of my life doing it!" I think that kind of thing is only hilarious in indie movies, not when you're doing them yourself, but, man....'Delilah' by Tom Jones? 'One Bad Apple' by the Osmonds? 'Que Sera Sera', in the style of Doris Day? AMAZING. I was giddy with the temptation to do a really, really weird song. How many times can you hear 'Since U Been Gone,' anyway? You know?

But I resisted. Next time? I might not be so strong. Especially if I make it to cheap drinks/sing free happy hour, some rainy afternoon, by myself, with a hankering for some oldies.

Sun on the Beach, Indeed.

Via Gowanus Lounge, I saw this picture and think it is terrific.

Spanish Guy: 1, Anna: 0

Guy: Can I ask you? Where did you get your shirt? Because I have never seen such a shirt?
Me: Oh, um, well, Forever 21.
Guy: OK. What do you do here?
Me: I'm an actor.
Guy: Are you a man?
Me: What?
Guy: You tell me you are an actor and now I am thinking that you are a man.

AUGUST, KINGS COUNTY

Recently:

Craig and I were walking by David Byrne's Wburg bike rack, "The Hipster."

Me: Oh, have you seen these? Do you know about these?
Craig: Yeah. Ooh, I'm a genius, I invent everything.
Blipster Leaving Bodega: Whoa, you're a hater. What happened to you, man?



Then I laughed so hard that I almost threw up, and Craig sulked down Bedford Ave until he had to turn for the subway.

OH MY GOD

I saw Robert Mruczek at Coney Island today.

IN THE ARCADE.


This is him:


I know who he is because of 'The King of Kong'-- and he was at Coney Island today (accompanied by a guy wearing a FUNSPOT t-shirt, for God's sake!!). I was staring and staring and took some "pictures of my mom standing by that water fountain" which of course were actually pictures of him...he definitely knew what I was doing. He was wearing a tie-dyed shirt with a wolf on it. The man defies explanation and classification.

AMAZING.


More about Coney Island later-- I went today for the first time and I thought it was wonderful. Time for this blog to stop being so lazy!!

3 beers in...

...and narcissism rears its ugly head! Selfinvolvedbot reporting for duty today, sir.

GOD DAMN!

BERNIE MAC *AND* ISAAC HAYES?!?!

Mr Gill, for you:

5 subway lines
+
4 episodes of Mad Men
+
3 Historic House Trust sites
+
3 boroughs
+
2 cops
+
1 cousin
______________
TODAY!

Now, let me get this straight...

Clay Aiken had a baby. Well, okay, Clay Aiken is the *reason* for someone having a baby.

(Okay, I shouldn't say it like that, either-- who knows how many babies were made while listening to "Measure of a Man?" Right? RIGHT??)


But seriously-- Clay Aiken and some woman...some woman named JAYMES...just had a baby. I don't understand this on any level. Clay? Jaymes? A baby? This is an equation that doesn't check.

Clay, oh Clay of my youth, where have you gone?!

(Really, I mean-- "obviously" this is some sort of thing where his friend was like "Oh lord, Clay, I'm gonna be an Old Maid, my clock is ticking, help me out here." And Clay being the nice guy, or the total FREAK, that he is...decided to help. What I want to know is if they did this the old-fashioned way or with the help of the medical establishment. Which is so far beyond being none of my business that it isn't even worth mentioning.)

Also, I realize I might be putting my personal integrity on the line by even speaking about this man. You must understand that senior year of high school, which was the second season of American Idol, my friends and I were absolutely obsessed with it and specifically with Clay. The best memory from that time, for me, is that the day after he lost was the day that my parents and I had to go in for a disciplinary meeting. For me. I was in twelfth grade, let's remember. Smooth L had screamed at me one too many times in Wind Ensemble and I finally let her have it...with only Akil as a witness. (Happy birthday, by the way, Mr. Middleton!) Anyway, I was dreading this meeting in the first place, and then on top of it all, Clay lost. That was also the day that the infamous/famous CFA class pic, which I will post (tinily) below, was taken. If you have good eyes, and can get past the fact that I'm wearing khakis, you'll see that Em and I are wearing Clay buttons. I imagine that Becky and Jess are, too.


Oh, boy. Clay. Where have you taken me?!

Not to be a bitch, BUT...

"I don't know how to be in a place where people don't know who Diane Keaton is."
-Erin